Asexual: Asexual people — also known as “Ace” or “Aces” — may experience little or no sexual attraction and/or experience sexual attraction in a non-normative way.
Demisexual (on the asexuality spectrum): People who only experience sexual attraction once they form a strong emotional connection with another person.

Reference: The Trevor Project

In case you didn’t know, I’m Pansexual / Demisexual, meaning I’m attracted to all, but not necessarily sexually. It wouldn’t surprise me if you were confused how asexuality works, especially in regards to sex work. I’m happy to share my views on it below, but please do come with an open mind. We’re all about that here.

When I was Zex, I was most definitely hypersexual as a trauma response. A nymphomaniac who hated sex – at least only with men, it seemed. It took me many years to acknowledge or understand that the encounters I experienced were terrible, which added to my lack of enjoyment. There was no bond. No negotiation. No imagination. Just in and out. Always brief, one-sided pleasure. Boring and unworthy of my divine presence. Even though I’m ace, it’s a misconception that we never have sex. Sexuality is a spectrum, and humans are wonderfully complex.

Fast forward to today, and you’ll notice that in your application that I ask questions that other providers might not. I wanna know your hobbies and why you think we’d be a good fit. I want us to bond before we’ve even met, and for that sweet oxytocin to sink right in. Even if you want to fuck me like a stranger, I wanna feel a sense of familiarity with you. I try to create a feeling similar the first time you meet someone you’re attracted to, and you get that alluring spark. Any potential lover who approaches me with only their desires mentioned absolutely bores me. It’s a big sign that says, “I do not respect you or your time. I think of you as an object and not a person”. No, thank you.

So how does sex work for someone on the asexuality spectrum? First of all, penetration (me receiving) is not necessarily taking place with every lover – again, this is a misconception. Some lovers only take me out on dates, and some others get their kicks from objectification that requires no sex/penetrative sex on my end. Some of my lovers are asexual themselves, although they don’t necessarily use the word to describe, but rather, “I don’t really like sex”. Some are happy for me to be the only one who touches them. Sex (Work) is complicated, but it’s less so when we see humans for being just that: human. Sex isn’t always about getting your dick wet. I like fucking your mind, too.

Asexuality and dominance is not very difficult to grasp because physical touch to a Goddess is only with Her permission, and many dominatrices don’t provide full service. I don’t want to speak for every person on the asexuality spectrum, but what I would say is my brain can be very focused on my partner and giving pleasure. My pussy isn’t necessarily getting wet, but it sparks something. Entertainment and focus. Again, I know many of my lovers who are familiar with this feeling, and it’s something I only really understood in my 30s.

When I first started sex work, or even just when I started having sex, the goal was different. You could say I’m a picky eater now. In my personal life, I often say no to sex because “free” sex must still come with an offering. I already have incredible sex and intimate encounters with impressive lovers/clients, that it doesn’t make it worthwhile to do for free. My terms are the same – I still need that spark, and I still need the constant feeling of desirability. There’s a huge attraction I feel towards those who invest in me – time, financially, brain power, thoughtfulness etc, if someone approaches Me without that, I’m not pulling my panties to the side or dropping to my knees for them.

Hope you learned something new today. Should you like to bond with me soon, get in touch. Just make sure you come with an offering and good manners to entice Me.

– Good Grief / DXXXRK